I've always been rather inept at love or at least feel that way. I always have real short relationships/ breakup very quickly.
Recently I've been seeing a gal, 4th date this evening, who I met at a party and is extremely attractive to me physically, smart, likes to dance(plus), and I think could be quite into me if I showed her a lot of attention/ physical contact.Was out with her tonight, met a friend of hers and then we met a guy at the bar who immediately was hitting on, making physical contact, with the girl I am seeing now. I was like rigid, only moving slowly and lightly with some contact at the end, not fighting with this guy's obvious affections, as my body almost has a physical and emotional/rational revulsion to getting really in the way of this guy's advances, as I'm not sure I can see marrying her for the rest of my life. I think she's sexy physically, young, etc, but personality, though she doesn't rub me badly, she doesn't lighten me up. We met a friend of hers at the bar and almost immediately I felt at ease with her friend and feel maybe there is potential(her personality lightens my heart) but I didn't find her physically attractive from a classic perspective.
But the problem is, I'm always fighting this issue. A girl is really attractive physically, and trained I move it on to the next level(physical) and then I bail(not that I date a lot) quickly afterward as I don't see it as a long term marriage thing. I am always torn between physical attraction and "feeling it" personality wise, and almost never seem to get the right combination. It's either great personality but not cute(not unnattracitve physically though), or attractive but not quite the vibe I'm looking for. Is there something wrong with me? Am I just being too picky. I feel like my gut says one thing and my eyes another. I almost wish I didn't have tons of testosterone as it always ***** me up. I'd rather be willing to say, wow, I dig her vibe even if she isn't totally physically attractive to me, and sometimes I feel if as if I was more female(not so visually driven, conditioned to go after women society and I deem physically attractive) things would be easier. I am definitely not gay though - I think she is hot and am attracted to women - its a push pull thing - attractive vs. personality(but not necessarily unnattractive- not cute)
Anyway, I almost think I should see a psychologist or something about this, or maybe I should try just dating someone I don't think is that attractive physically(not unattractive though) but find I click with. Anyway, I almost feel like I need to break up with this girl I'm seeing now if she doesn't break up with me first do to lack of physical escalation. arhg! I feel really strongly that if she doesn't break up with me, to let hers to pursue other options. I should just say to her "let's be friends" (we havent' gotten closer than a couple of back touches/rubs at a club at the end of this past eventing when I knew I had to give her some sort of reassurance or get off the boat).
I feel embarrassed but I also feel so clueless so I guess its why I'm asking in this forum.
sounds like you are afraid of commitment. Maybe you just aren't ready for commitment. You don't give your age, so it's hard to say exactly.
no you are not picky you jut want the right girl!! you dnt want to get stuck with the wrong person!! as 4 your gf!! I think that you should not just date a woman for how they look physically but what they are like inside!! I say hit on your gfs friend whose personality that you like!! i am all 4 it!! personality will trump beauty/sexiness any day!! good luck!!! hope that this helps!! =]
lol wow thats was really long
welll ok where to start..............
i dont theres anything wrong with u and i dont think u should see a doc. but u r picky(not a bad thing)
if ur just after sex i would suggest going atfer the physical attraction and not the personality
but if u want to have along relationship u shouldnt always base off looks cause sometimes the hottest girls are complete bimbos and those are the ones u screw then leave if u r looking for love and wat not i would suggest that u start dating girls that u click with personality wise and after ur with them the burning attraction might come after u care for them a little nut seriously start looking in personality and character not just *** and **** it works better in the long run
hope this helped :):)
good luck
Well.... To me, if you really want to find a true relationship that can last, you should really go find some friends and start for the basic instead of going for looks. Start by chatting like normal school friends and learn about each other. Don't need to rush things. Looks can attract you for now, but sooner or later, it will cool off and you'll lose interest and treat that person as a normal person instead of a close friend or girlfriend. You can break up with the girl you are currently with now if you want. Cause i don't think it will last long as its just a temporary attraction ><
First, you'll get proper answers only when you ask it in a short way.
Try that and then come here.
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