I have a meeting tonight, with 3 other women, and I know that at least one of them wanted this meeting held without me. I thought that she and I got along really well (she came to my birthday party, has been to my house for coffee, etc) but apparently I was wrong.
Would you :
A) Go to the meeting and pretend that nothing is wrong, and not let on that you knew she didn't want you to be there?
B) Go to the meeting and confront her about not inviting you, and demand an explanation?
C) [Another option]
A -- what you know is your ace, you know something that she has said about you, but she doesn't know that. i suggest you don't confront her about it, instead focus on your work and do your tasks better and perfectly. think of the sweet revenge you'll get when you're up there on the career ladder and she's left behind. and if you did talk to her about it, i don't think that's gonna fix anything. she's obviously a ***** -- even when you try to make ammends, she'll stay the way she is -- and probably ***** about you when you're not around.
im asian, but i don't look asian (im half-european) -- and one time while i was doing clinical rotation, these asian women were talking about me and was really mean (they thought i could not understand what they're saying) they were saying stuff like "im not gonna help that stupid girl" -- i was tempted to say something in my language to embarrass them, but i held back instead. i liked playing with their minds. whenever they said something about me, i'd give them the look that i know what they're talking about, but not say something -- they were paranoid.
at the same time, i learned a couple of things... these people have the crab mentality, they will bring you down to bring themselves up. they would not tell me details about the work, but i used my ability to understand their language without their knowing and use it to my advantage. so in the end -- i had the ace in my hands, i performed better, thanks to them.
so that's my secret... never reveal what you know.
i was gonna email you back to thank you for picking me as the best answer... what you did was absolutely right. i just hope that the other people you work with are sensitive enough to see that she's being rude. don't worry, her time will come. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/accuse_write?qid=20060803123058AAXOJ1h&kid=F5EoCTS9WTCsXotZRgs6NEUZQRdF6TSDEKzIGrLUJ2SZQFo.Gndu&s=comm&date=2006-08-04+08%3A31%3A11&.crumb=
If you could "make nice" with person, why can't you be equally nice to your ex. Wishing someone is dead will bring bad karma to you. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/accuse_write?qid=20060803123058AAXOJ1h&kid=NbUvWjW0WDOxBGzsevAg&s=comm&date=2006-08-08+13%3A06%3A59&.crumb=
Go to the meeting and be the bigger person
B- let her know you aren't stupid and you know somethings up
A, Absolutely! Otherwise, you'll make yourself look bad if you choose "B." After that, I'm not sure what possibility there could be for another option.
SInce you know that she doesn't want you at the meeting, just pay close attention to her. Don't be intimidated by her, but "forewarned is forearmed." Don't let her throw you. Just go on with things.
A.) be the biggger person and who cares about her, the other 2 wanted you there so thats all that matters.
Go to the meeting and act like you know nothing about it. It's hear-say, anyway. How do you know for sure that it isn't gossip. By being gracious, you are giving her the chance to have a change of heart and feel guilty as heck. - If she doesn't you're showing her that you are definitely the better person.
Don't let idle gossip prevent you from putting your best foot forward and being yourself. Have fun- and totally act like you
know nothing about it. Answer A.
B) Go to the meeting and confront her about not inviting you, and demand an explanation?
Don't be a hypocrite!
C. if the meeting is NOT important...then don't go. see if she calls you to she what happened. If she does, then maybe she cares. If she doesn't than she probably did not want you there. (also have an excuse ready in case she does call)
B. This girl has been to your house for coffee!
a!
you dont want to ruin the meeting so dont confront her.
just be nice and she wont like it that you're there but if she says something then its her fault.
keep your freinds close and your enemies closer.
definitely A.
c. go to the meeting and not hide your feelings that by the end of the meeting she is wandering why you are acting the way you are, then I hit her with "some people didn't want me here and I'm wondering why, what do you think."
I would go to the meeting and ignore her.. If she was going to talk to me I would nicely smile and walk away.. You don't want to spoil the meeting but you would let her know that you are aware of her intentions.... Be the bigger person and keep your head on high....
C) I'd go & be very polite & I would bring it up to her very nicely...say something like, "well so & so told me you didn't want me here" & smile politely at her & wait. She'll be forced to explain herself......and yea we're all adults but so what....you really wanna know why she doesn't want you there right?....this is how you find out in a nice way without making yourself look bad.
A but watch her reaction when you walk in
B
i would do A)
Go to the meeting, and when it's over tell her you want to talk to her in private. Tell her **** you I don't care if you want me around or not.
C) What I would do is act really polite. Offer them help and have VERY good manners. They might get the hint that you knew they don't like you, without you having to confront them. :)
I would go with the first one
A. Just be polite about it.
c. ) Go to the meeting, bring up a really good idea and when everyone starts raving about it, subtly say, "See!, and you didn't even want me to be here! How bout that?"
A. Period.
A) go to the meeting and pretend nothing is wrong- if you want to confront her do it another time when the others aren't around so they don't feel awkward.
A - just ignore it. If it bothers her too much, let her say something. If not, I wouldn't worry about it.
Just go to the meeting, and act like nothing has happened... then just watch her reactions...
How do you know she wanted the meeting held without you? did she tell you herself? if not, your knowledge could be based on gossip or miscommunication or even someone lying to you. I would go, and ask her NICELY if this is actually true. And be prepared for any answer.
I'll be praying for you!
janet
Go there, discuss whatever it is the meeting requires, and then leave. Be an adult and don't start a confrontation or let your hurt feelings get in the way. There's no point at demanding an explanation... everyone has a right to their own opinion, and putting the other women on the spot will make them feel attacked.
A) Because it's irrelavent;even if she did say that, she obviously didn't get her way. Take it up with her another time.
A then a few days later B
A.....why give her the satisfaction of you making her seem more important than she is?
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